:: Gozoto Blog ::

:: Saturday, March 24, 2007 ::

(17:34:42) ElliotoGozoto: watching a documentary about a whole bunch of afghan prisoners that surrendered to the american government and northern alliance...and a whole bunch went missing and some were found dead...they were in american custody
(17:35:07) ElliotoGozoto: like 5000 of them
(17:35:12) oddbird14: damn
(17:37:07) ElliotoGozoto: we also allied with some really really really really shady characters in afghanistan that are thought to be at least partly responsible
(17:40:48) oddbird14: ohh man
(17:42:12) ElliotoGozoto: ya...ohhhhh man
(17:51:20) ElliotoGozoto: weird...apparently...some of the missing prisoners were sold to the KGB
(17:52:46) ElliotoGozoto: fucking holocaust tactics
(17:53:56) oddbird14: hah yeah
(17:56:48) ElliotoGozoto: they are interviewing this dude that says he fired a bunch of bullets into these truck containers full of prisoners so they would be better ventilated and then blood came pouring out and many prisoners died this way
(17:59:09) oddbird14: oh god thats awful
(17:59:45) ElliotoGozoto: some of the trucks were left in the desert for nearly a week and there was evidense of canibalism, but no survivors in some of them
(18:01:10) ElliotoGozoto: "the smell was a smell that would make you forget all other smells you experienced in your life"
(18:02:50) oddbird14: please no more
(18:03:01) oddbird14: itll put me in an awful mood
(18:03:12) ElliotoGozoto: ya...i'm feelin that
(18:03:18) ElliotoGozoto: this documentary is no fun at all

:: Ellioto Gozoto 5:08 PM [+] ::
...

When I close my eyes this song comes true and so I begin to write in my blog again

Rilo Kiley - My Slumbering Heart

In my dreams
I see myself hitting a baseball
In a green field somewhere near a freeway
I'm all tan and smiling and running from 3rd base
And it's hot and
The kids keep playing the driving game
And they're singing the same goddamn refrain
And the sky is a blueish grey.
And its become just like a chemical stress
Tracing the lines in my face for
Something more beautiful than is there
I've barely been gone.
In my dreams
I see you at the foot of some mountains.
And we're taking some pictures or something
And we'd better hurry up
And it's late and
The sun keeps on shooting through pine trees
And the grass stains are wet on your new jeans
And we'd better hurry up
And I've become just like a terrible mess
searching the lines in my face for
something more beautiful than is there
the crowds keep me coming back. Cheering.
In my dreams
I see you asleep on a twin bed
The covers pulled up over your head
Am I asleep or awake?
And it's morning
And the captain is playing the radio
And hes just put the paint on his new boat
Am I asleep or awake?
And it just feels good when you're waking up
And it just feels good when you're next to me
And it just feels good when you're coming home
And it just feels good when you're waking up
And I've become just like a chemical stress
Tracing the lines of my face for
Something more beautiful than is there
I've barely been gone
and I'm not a failure
I swear
I wish you could see it from over there
I've got a lot over here without you
I've barely been gone
gone
dreaming

Spent a day and a night at IU and I am none the wiser

:: Ellioto Gozoto 2:43 PM [+] ::
...

So Ive had a crazy time recently...and most of it I dont want to talk about...but lets say ive gone on and off the market twice in only one week...someone shoot me in the face damn it.

I really just want to not go to college. Not go to school anymore at all. Get a dead end job that provides just enough money for fruits and vegitables on a regular basis and a small apartment. In that apartment I shall spend the rest of my days thinking in the dark with a record playing. Maybe I can get a slightly better job and afford internet to support my music addiction. Occasionally I will attend concerts if only to bum smokes and drinks from unsuspecting patrons. Then one day i will marry a pretty girl also in a deadend job and we can live happily ever after eating fruits and vegitables.

Im gonna be a politician too...just cause i shouldnt be allowed to be one...i think its fitting

I really think its time to shave my head...if u dont think so...then i will ask you to cut it...if you do think i should shave it I will ask you to please keep the scissors away. and then I will dance.

So yea...if u would like to date me for a period of only 3 days...just manage to avoid me for two of those days...its the best!

If you would like to date me for only 2 days...just make sure its within ur nature ro have multiple partners at once and the ability to hide it from the ignorant...I am not ignorant so 2 days is the best...weee

SO I am going to also be a break dancer in my spare time (there is much free time)...master break dance fighter.

somebody come here right now...I need someone

:: Ellioto Gozoto 3:12 PM [+] ::
...

So I had this "experience" and it was like it completed a lot of the thoughts I've been having and man did it feel good to have some kind of resolution. It took me a day or 2 to organize it all but I think i finally know what I believe and I think I know what its all about.

Microtouch commercial: "what a great way for women to keep the men in their lives perfectly groomed"

so now that I feel better about the world its time to get a guitar and learn to play it then i can write some good music and do some groupies...yay

my sister: "you need to get a guitar so you can make music and play it for me now instead of some college slut girl in college cause you are definitely gonna play guitar by college."

now for some bus station talk. Thats right...me work at greyhound and at the bus station...we get some creepy characters. A few days ago we got these kiddos with kiddos who got kicked off their bus and then the cops were called and the one was cuffed and it was awesome cause the one guy threw his own shit across the parking lot...it was neato.

:: Ellioto Gozoto 12:04 PM [+] ::
...

Hey...I haven't written in a while just cause I haven't felt like it. Been kinda down with just thinking too much about everything. Its kind of odd that I have been feeling down cause the past few weeks have included some really really great experiences. Duraluxe shows out the wazooo...hanging with good people...my sister(anna)'s wedding which was beautiful...and I have had some good bonding time with my other older sister Emily. I just have been having a lot of really weird dreams and it has sort of freaked me out. like ones with people I love dieing in plane crashes and others getting arrested by the cops and this one night I had a dream where I myself got arrested and whenever I was caught after a bit of a chase...then I woke up in cold sweat and when i went back to sleep it happened again only with a different scenerio. This happened like six times. I also keep having these like day dreams that are equally disturbing. I will be sitting listening to music and my mind will just wander to these gruesome images...gah and I dont even know where it is coming from. I think i just need to stay away from reality...can anyone get me some heroin?...haha...so anyways...I am sorta worried about Emily, Jamie, and Sarah because of my dreams and I tried to call jamie to warn her(from my dream sounds weird but u know...freakin me out)...I really have just been trying my hardest to keep plane crashed out of my mind and just visualizing safe landings and such.

Started my new job at the bus station. Its supercool...perhaps jawsome

Now I'm gonna list all the people who have died or been arrested or met some other fate in my dreams so u can watch urself.

Jamie
Emily (all of them...there are so many)
Emilie
John (my cousin)
Sarah
Stephen
Heidi (the carcrash I saw already happened though and she lived though)
Betsy
Ben
my grandparents (dad's side...but they have already passed)
myself
my other sisters (the non-emily ones)

Im sure there are more so just everyone be careful out there...im so friggin afraid of death.

this shit is pretty creepy

and now the song im gonna throw in is really beautiful and is in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind cause that movie is beautiful too...and I saw it with Luther and Whitney not long ago and that was my third time seeing it...holy crap is it wonderful. goddamn is it excellent holy crap.

Beck - Everybody's Gotta Learn Sometime

Change your heart, look around you
Change your heart, it will astound you
I need your loving like the sunshine
And everybody's gotta learn sometime
Everybody's gotta learn sometime
Everybody's gotta learn sometime

Change your heart, look around you
Change your heart, it will astound you
I need your loving like the sunshine
And everybody's gotta learn sometime
Everybody's gotta learn sometime
Everybody's gotta learn sometime

Everybody's gotta learn sometime

:: Ellioto Gozoto 10:35 AM [+] ::
...

MY NEW FAVORITE SONG!!!

lets go back
back to the beginning
back to when the earth the sun the stars
all aligned

cause perfect didn't feel so perfect
trying to fit a square into a circle
was no life
i defy

chorus:
let the rain fall down
and wake my dreams
let it wash away
my sanity
cause i wanna hear the thunder
i wanna scream
let the rain fall down
i'm coming clean, i'm coming clean

i'm shedding
shedding every color
trying to find a pigment of truth
beneath my skin

cause different didn't feel so different
and going out is better
than always staying in
feel the wind

chours:
let the rain fall down
and wake my dreams
let it wash away
my sanity
cause i wanna hear the thunder
i wanna scream
let the rain fall down
i'm coming clean, i'm coming clean

i'm coming clean
let the rain fall
let the rain fall
i'm coming clean

chorus:
let the rain fall down
and wake my dreams
let it wash away
my sanity
cause i wanna feel the thunder
i wanna scream
let the rain fall down
i'm coming clean, i'm coming clean

lets go back
back to the beginning

thats right...its by the oh so hot lizzie mcguire (hilary duff)

:: Ellioto Gozoto 5:06 PM [+] ::
...

The dreams in which I'm dieing are the best I've ever had.

as AP testing comes closer(tomorrow morning)...i find a need a cigarette...then i fill my mind with the songs of duralux, spoon, elf power, and neutral milk hotel...then I close my eyes and think of happy things...It is tragic how the world is crushing me with final projects and homework and tests and very few rests.

Its time for a change...im gonna drop out of school...it will surprise everyone...EVERYONE!!!!...i need not the knowledge of the commons i need only that which can be found through living. Lets run away and start a new life where the sun shines behind a cloud of water vapor and happiness.

so welcome to Thornton's fuck and cut...our current special is...I will let you cut my hair if you love me and will make love to me.

:: Ellioto Gozoto 10:07 PM [+] ::
...